Question:
1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Holiday spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.
2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. Like fine single-malt scotch, it's rare. In fact, it's even rarer than single-malt scotch. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-aholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think.
3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed
potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.
5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Holiday party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?
6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.
8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or, if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.
10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention.
Reread tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.
Remember this motto to live by:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"
Well said Jody!!
Thanks Karen...wish I could say I said it. I should have said it was sent to me in an email, author unknown. But I do wholeheartedly endorse the message!
Great Tips!
PS - I'm trying as hard as I can to live by your motto!
Steve, in honor of that, I'm making it my signature! For awhile anyway. Pass the 'tinis and chocolate!
Jody
My holiday eating tip: Get to Jody's house ASAP!!!!
Oooh, good tip, Annie...the welcome mat is out!
xoxoxo
Jody
Another good tip is to bring your own tupperware bowls so you can bring some home.
Now those are my kind of Holiday eating tips!
Egg Nog... from personaly experience you CAN become an eggnog-aholic. Man.. the DT's come January when you can't find it anymore......
Jody,
I'm on the next flight! :D Can you pick me up? :p
xoxoxo
Sounds like a plan to me. People here talk about starting the Pagano Diet, I am sticking with the Jody diet. It work and its so good. The only thing I would add is to remember to eat from the five basic food groups to have some balance.
As a reminder here they are.
SUGAR
STARCH
FAT
ALCOHOL
SALT
This diet works. Already 60 lbs overwight. By the way choclate is a sub set of sugar. I know many want it to have a catagory to itsself but nutritional science say it is not!
Mitch
Why is it that if it tastes good it probably isn't good for you?
Mitch you forgot TOFU!!!!!!! LMAO
XOXO
roflamao finally someone got it right
Another little diet tip,
[SIZE=3]"FAT FREE, TASTE FREE'[/SIZE]
[SIZE=3]IF ITS GOOD FOR YOU IT TASTE LIKE CRAP[/SIZE]
Mitch
Ahh......Coach here................You guys wouldn't dare now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hear ya "here comes coach hide the crap"---hmm now I see how you are!!! :eek: j/k
Fat coaches make the best coaches! LOL
Do as I want to do not what I can do.
Mitch
See you saturday
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEE E IT!
I'm shrinking this list down and laminating it so I can put it in my wallet and refer to it often!!!
I must admit though, I am pretty good at perfoming all of these steps without the aid of the list though! :eek:
Happy Holiday Parties to you all!
Love,
Diana
If your body craves it, it MUST be good for you? Right?
2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. Like fine single-malt scotch, it's rare. In fact, it's even rarer than single-malt scotch. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-aholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think.
3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed
potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.
5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Holiday party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?
6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.
8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or, if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.
10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention.
Reread tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.
Remember this motto to live by:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"
Answers:
Well said Jody!!
Answers:
Thanks Karen...wish I could say I said it. I should have said it was sent to me in an email, author unknown. But I do wholeheartedly endorse the message!
Answers:
Great Tips!
PS - I'm trying as hard as I can to live by your motto!
Answers:
Steve, in honor of that, I'm making it my signature! For awhile anyway. Pass the 'tinis and chocolate!
Jody
Answers:
My holiday eating tip: Get to Jody's house ASAP!!!!
Answers:
Oooh, good tip, Annie...the welcome mat is out!
xoxoxo
Jody
Answers:
Another good tip is to bring your own tupperware bowls so you can bring some home.
Answers:
Now those are my kind of Holiday eating tips!
Egg Nog... from personaly experience you CAN become an eggnog-aholic. Man.. the DT's come January when you can't find it anymore......
Answers:
Jody,
I'm on the next flight! :D Can you pick me up? :p
xoxoxo
Answers:
Sounds like a plan to me. People here talk about starting the Pagano Diet, I am sticking with the Jody diet. It work and its so good. The only thing I would add is to remember to eat from the five basic food groups to have some balance.
As a reminder here they are.
SUGAR
STARCH
FAT
ALCOHOL
SALT
This diet works. Already 60 lbs overwight. By the way choclate is a sub set of sugar. I know many want it to have a catagory to itsself but nutritional science say it is not!
Mitch
Answers:
Why is it that if it tastes good it probably isn't good for you?
Mitch you forgot TOFU!!!!!!! LMAO
XOXO
Answers:
roflamao finally someone got it right
Answers:
Another little diet tip,
[SIZE=3]"FAT FREE, TASTE FREE'[/SIZE]
[SIZE=3]IF ITS GOOD FOR YOU IT TASTE LIKE CRAP[/SIZE]
Mitch
Answers:
Ahh......Coach here................You guys wouldn't dare now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hear ya "here comes coach hide the crap"---hmm now I see how you are!!! :eek: j/k
Answers:
Fat coaches make the best coaches! LOL
Do as I want to do not what I can do.
Mitch
See you saturday
Answers:
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEE E IT!
I'm shrinking this list down and laminating it so I can put it in my wallet and refer to it often!!!
I must admit though, I am pretty good at perfoming all of these steps without the aid of the list though! :eek:
Happy Holiday Parties to you all!
Love,
Diana
Answers:
If your body craves it, it MUST be good for you? Right?
1 2