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Absolute Very Best Sunscreen Lotion
Question:

In my opinion, Crisco is the absolute very best sunscreen lotion.
First, you can get a huge tub of that stuff for about a buck ten.
You swab yourself down with it head to toe and lay down.
When you hear yourself sizzle.....well....that's the alarm that tells you it's time to move your behind out of the sun.

Answers:

Plus, it'll give you that nice fried-chicken scent, eliminating the need for deodorant or cologne..
Looks pretty win-win from where I sit...

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