Question:
I've been feeling a bit down about the driving and sleeping problems issue I'm having - still unable to get into the car and drive to work each day (but am fine at weekends/evenings)
I started reading the transcripts and case studies on the emofree site, mainly "dottie" and then "the reason behind vertigo." I was reading about getting more specific, and tried to apply it. When I'm driving in the day I fear not being in control of the car, of causing someones death. So I tried to go back to a time when I felt I wasn't in control and assess the intensity. Was not prepared to feel so awful
What is coming up is the death of my dad. He died of cancer 10 years ago, I couldn't control what was happening and I have always blamed myself for his death. 6 months before he was diagnosed, I went through the one and only rebellious stage in my life, dating a very unsuitable man who my parents hated(he that wrapped the car round a tree). When matters came to a head I left home for a while. A week after I returned my dad went to the doctor and was subsequently diagnosed with cancer.
My intensity is a good 10/11 and I don't understand why this has come up over a driving phobia.
(Edited to sound less rambling and emotional)
Oh, Eliana, I'm so sorry.
I'll send you some healing, and I hope you get it.
A man's cancer is not his daughter's responsibility, no matter how disruptive his daughter is being. If it is anybody's responsibility it's his own.
You poor girl, it was not your fault.
You need help to deal with this issue: evidently there's too much in it to deal with on your own. Perhaps an NLP therapist? I've been helped through childhood issues in an NLP session for something else, which unexpectedly brought the issues up, very close and made me a trembling wreck. It was suggested I put the matter in a perspex box (no good) then a thick fog - that worked. It separated me from that part of myself I was too scared to go near. Can you distance yourself from that situation: put an imaginary physical barrier up? Just a s a temporary measure before you get more help.
You will get through this. It occurs to me that you probably didn't get it out of your system as you thought - otherwise you probably would be able to drive OK at night. You felt out of control then, and in a situation such as night driving, your emotions are telling you that you are in a similar situation. You're not, but that's what your inner voice is telling you.
Much love,
Sharonxx
Hi Eliana
The tapping will work, you need to tap when you are most caught up in your emotions it is most effective then, dont wait to calm down, concentrate on your set up statements and make sure you are just doing one at a time and not the whole thing....separate them into little chunks.....it will be ok..
I am sure some wonderful people will be along soon to offer more words of wisdom...keep going you can get through this.
Tiger
x
Hi Sharon and Tracey
I tapped on the memory (of being told "if only we'd caught it a few months earlier") and am feeling a bit better now. Will probably go back and edit the initial post as it was a bit personal but thanks very much for your kind and thoughtful words. Not sleeping well so am a bit tired and emotional at the moment!
[sm=grouphug.gif]
Eli xx
Hi Eliana
Try tapping for these after you have rated their intensity 0-10:
Even though I am to blame for my Dad's death, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though I feel guilty for being rebelious when Dad needed me, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though I miss Dad terribly, I deeply and completely accept myself. (this one has my words & may not be yours, so disregard if they don't seem to fit with you)
Even though am still unable to get into the car and drive to work each day, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though I fear not being in control of the car, of causing someones death, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Remember to be persistent, and we are all here to support you.
Hugs[sm=grouphug.gif]
Steve
Hi eli,
I noticed that you say at the end of your message that you have edited this to sound less rambling and emotional. Yet at the opening of your message you say you are 'feeling a bit down' and also having sleeping problems. Other than the choice that you did not want to disclose - sometimes writing down your feelings and getting these out is more healthier than bottling them up inside.
Bereavement and loss issues can create complex emotional blocks and feelings of being stuck. With this, it makes me wonder if you might benefit from talking more about the loss of your father and the feelings you are still holding onto. Processing sensitive issues appropriately, especially can allow the opportunity for you to explore related situations and circumstances that act as a trigger to affect your behaviour and life.
Pauline Maria
Hi Eli, how are you today?
Sharon.
Much better thanks Sharon - went to the doctor about sleeping problems and did a LOT of tapping on the specific issues that came up last night. Even managed to go out in the car today! And then it broke down!! [sm=rollaugh.gif][sm=rollaugh.gif][sm=rollaugh.gif]. Lovely RAC got me home from the A14. Never mind -I did it. I had to laugh though!
WELL DONE YOU!
;)
T
x
That's really good to hear - you must be making fantastic progress if you're laughing about something like that - will send some more Reiki to you.
Sharonxxx
Excellent! Keep it going Eli, tap-tap:)
Glad to hear you are getting to grips with it.
Hugs:)
Steve
Cool :):):):):):)
I started reading the transcripts and case studies on the emofree site, mainly "dottie" and then "the reason behind vertigo." I was reading about getting more specific, and tried to apply it. When I'm driving in the day I fear not being in control of the car, of causing someones death. So I tried to go back to a time when I felt I wasn't in control and assess the intensity. Was not prepared to feel so awful
What is coming up is the death of my dad. He died of cancer 10 years ago, I couldn't control what was happening and I have always blamed myself for his death. 6 months before he was diagnosed, I went through the one and only rebellious stage in my life, dating a very unsuitable man who my parents hated(he that wrapped the car round a tree). When matters came to a head I left home for a while. A week after I returned my dad went to the doctor and was subsequently diagnosed with cancer.
My intensity is a good 10/11 and I don't understand why this has come up over a driving phobia.
(Edited to sound less rambling and emotional)
Answers:
Oh, Eliana, I'm so sorry.
I'll send you some healing, and I hope you get it.
A man's cancer is not his daughter's responsibility, no matter how disruptive his daughter is being. If it is anybody's responsibility it's his own.
You poor girl, it was not your fault.
You need help to deal with this issue: evidently there's too much in it to deal with on your own. Perhaps an NLP therapist? I've been helped through childhood issues in an NLP session for something else, which unexpectedly brought the issues up, very close and made me a trembling wreck. It was suggested I put the matter in a perspex box (no good) then a thick fog - that worked. It separated me from that part of myself I was too scared to go near. Can you distance yourself from that situation: put an imaginary physical barrier up? Just a s a temporary measure before you get more help.
You will get through this. It occurs to me that you probably didn't get it out of your system as you thought - otherwise you probably would be able to drive OK at night. You felt out of control then, and in a situation such as night driving, your emotions are telling you that you are in a similar situation. You're not, but that's what your inner voice is telling you.
Much love,
Sharonxx
Answers:
Hi Eliana
The tapping will work, you need to tap when you are most caught up in your emotions it is most effective then, dont wait to calm down, concentrate on your set up statements and make sure you are just doing one at a time and not the whole thing....separate them into little chunks.....it will be ok..
I am sure some wonderful people will be along soon to offer more words of wisdom...keep going you can get through this.
Tiger
x
Answers:
Hi Sharon and Tracey
I tapped on the memory (of being told "if only we'd caught it a few months earlier") and am feeling a bit better now. Will probably go back and edit the initial post as it was a bit personal but thanks very much for your kind and thoughtful words. Not sleeping well so am a bit tired and emotional at the moment!
[sm=grouphug.gif]
Eli xx
Answers:
Hi Eliana
Try tapping for these after you have rated their intensity 0-10:
Even though I am to blame for my Dad's death, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though I feel guilty for being rebelious when Dad needed me, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though I miss Dad terribly, I deeply and completely accept myself. (this one has my words & may not be yours, so disregard if they don't seem to fit with you)
Even though am still unable to get into the car and drive to work each day, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Even though I fear not being in control of the car, of causing someones death, I deeply and completely accept myself.
Remember to be persistent, and we are all here to support you.
Hugs[sm=grouphug.gif]
Steve
Answers:
Hi eli,
I noticed that you say at the end of your message that you have edited this to sound less rambling and emotional. Yet at the opening of your message you say you are 'feeling a bit down' and also having sleeping problems. Other than the choice that you did not want to disclose - sometimes writing down your feelings and getting these out is more healthier than bottling them up inside.
Bereavement and loss issues can create complex emotional blocks and feelings of being stuck. With this, it makes me wonder if you might benefit from talking more about the loss of your father and the feelings you are still holding onto. Processing sensitive issues appropriately, especially can allow the opportunity for you to explore related situations and circumstances that act as a trigger to affect your behaviour and life.
Pauline Maria
Answers:
Hi Eli, how are you today?
Sharon.
Answers:
Much better thanks Sharon - went to the doctor about sleeping problems and did a LOT of tapping on the specific issues that came up last night. Even managed to go out in the car today! And then it broke down!! [sm=rollaugh.gif][sm=rollaugh.gif][sm=rollaugh.gif]. Lovely RAC got me home from the A14. Never mind -I did it. I had to laugh though!
Answers:
WELL DONE YOU!
;)
T
x
Answers:
That's really good to hear - you must be making fantastic progress if you're laughing about something like that - will send some more Reiki to you.
Sharonxxx
Answers:
Excellent! Keep it going Eli, tap-tap:)
Glad to hear you are getting to grips with it.
Hugs:)
Steve
Answers:
Cool :):):):):):)
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